February 6, 2012

Always Being Accessible

Last week I was sharing with a good friend the challenges I faced through Brandon’s behaviors, experiences, and journey.  At one point she commented on my ability to stay focused and keep moving despite the painful distractions these events created.  What I shared with her was one of the four powerful lessons of 100 Pedals – embracing responsibility.  Despite what has happened or what I experience in my life, it is not my attitude that keeps me moving; but, my responsibility for making my unique gifts constantly available to others.

We have all been blessed with our own remarkable set of very special gifts, talents and abilities.  We may not yet know or confidently embrace what those gifts are.  And, we may not yet be prepared to consciously and powerfully share them with everyone (lesson two: living with passion).  Regardless of the state of awareness to our uniqueness, it still exists in us and others can and do see it in us even if we don’t.  The difference between consciously sharing and unconsciously offering your gifts is found only in the power and with which you bring your unique qualities into action.

These special abilities in all of us bring us together to accomplish great things.  It is through our gifts that we touch, connect, support, influence, and help others.  And, it is through the gifts of others that we find and share energy, joy, perspectives and experiences.

There are people on their own personal journey looking for exactly what we have to offer.  And, even though we may not be aware of the impact that we can have on these individuals, we still have so much to offer them simply by engaging, living, and connecting with them.  Despite our frame of mind, regardless of our own challenges, and even if we do not yet embrace the power and influence of our uniqueness, we have a responsibility to make ourselves available to others.  Because there are those people in need of what we have to offer, we do not have the right to deny them access to our gifts, even if we are not physically or mentally prepared to do so.

I shared this perspective with Brandon.  He was getting frustrated with the fact he wasn’t making the money he envisioned, getting a new job was becoming a challenge, and he resented living under the watchful, worrisome eyes of his parents.  He started to withdrawl and head into a downward trend.  I wondered out loud why he wasn’t going to his NA (narcotics anonymous) group.  He shared that he didn’t feel he would get much out of it.  I turned it around on him.  He needs to go to that meeting to share and be available to others.  For there is likely someone in that group looking for what he has to offer.  By not being at the meetings, he is potentially denying someone access to him at a time when they need him most.  While he may or not be aware of it, his presence at the meeting could have a profound effect on someone else’s life.  It clearly made him rethink the purpose and the opportunities associated with his NA meetings.

Embracing responsibility is that simple.  Our presence creates an opportunity for others to access what we have to offer.  Because it is a gift we must share it with others as often and as freely as we possibly can – even if we cannot see it, know it, or own it – yet.  Remember, someone is looking for what you have.  Get out there and help them find it in you.

About Dave Cooke

Dave Cooke is a dad on a mission. His mission is to help parents get control of their lives over the powerful, destructive influences of a child's addiction. As the father of a son in a ten year heroin battle, Dave knows all to well the challenges parents and families face. He also knows there is a way to find peace in the chaos. It is his mission to help parents discover their path to a healthier, balanced life even if a child's active addiction is still part of their daily journey.