November 28, 2011

It Starts with Humility

“Courage, strength and perseverance are best discovered through the humbling awareness that you cannot win your battles on your own.”

Over the past few weeks, I have started to reflect on the lessons and experiences from this past year.  I have learned a great, accomplished even more, and I have enjoyed sharing and celebrating everything about 100 Pedals.  Originally, I believed that the lessons learned in 100 Pedals were all about accomplishment and goal setting, etc.  And, in many cases the by product of these lessons has provided me a stronger platform from which I can establish and achieve incredible outcomes. However, there is more to the 100 Pedals experience that simply setting and achieving goals.

The real accomplishment of 100 Pedals is more about what I learned than what I accomplished.  100 Pedals taught me how to discover and leverage those resources that would help me find the strength, the energy and the focus to keep moving and overcome the obstacles in front of me.  The gift of 100 Pedals is the lessons in the journey for which I am grateful and happy to share.

Finding the strength to overcome the challenges we face starts with accepting with humility the fact that we cannot do it ourselves, that we do not have all the answers, and that we are not alone in our battles.  When something really painful happens in our life, it is okay to ask for help.  It is alright to admit we need someone else’s assistance.  There is no reason to fight the battle alone.

It is the experiences, the unique skills, and the love and kindness of others that will help us discover our way through a challenge.  The challenge is finding the humility to ask for help.  For some reason, we think that we cannot admit to our friends, our family, or even to a stranger the fact that we are dealing with something that feels bigger or badder than us.  This is the misconception  of our challenges — we do not have to deal with them ourselves.

When I first started dealing with Brandon’s addiction challenges and first engaged in my 100 Pedals rides, I felt like I was the only soldier in the battle. This was my fight and I alone had to figure out a way to win the war.  Little did I realize or notice all the people who were introducing themselves to me and how they were making themselves available to help me.  Although they offered their support, their concern, their advice, and their prayers, I felt like I was the only guy in the fight.

As I started sharing my story and became more engaged in the energy and inspiration of the rides, I realized that I had an entire army of people who were there for me.  It was only when I reached that point in the battle where I allowed myself to be open, honest, and receptive to their love, their insights, and their positive energy was I able to engage in the promise and opportunity of my adventure.

Being humble is not a weakness, it is a gift.  Through our humility we are able to be real, be open, be receptive, and be accessible to others.  It is in our humility that we actually find the real strength and wisdom to move forward with the power and support of others.

Next time you find yourself stuck — in pain, at a loss, or in distress — remember the best place to fight that battle is with the support, love, guidance and strength of others.  Do not be afraid to ask for help.  The best gift you can give to yourself is that of humility — it is where you discover the greatness in yourself and of those around you.

Humility and Authenticity
About Dave Cooke

Dave Cooke is a dad on a mission. His mission is to help parents get control of their lives over the powerful, destructive influences of a child's addiction. As the father of a son in a ten year heroin battle, Dave knows all to well the challenges parents and families face. He also knows there is a way to find peace in the chaos. It is his mission to help parents discover their path to a healthier, balanced life even if a child's active addiction is still part of their daily journey.