April 2, 2012

The Visit

“You are never alone.  There is always someone in your world looking to share their gifts and looking to discover those that you have to offer.”

One of the most incredible realizations along my 100 Pedals journey was the number of people who entered my life during my greatest struggles, offering to help.  And, because of the inward facing, self-determined nature of my being I was not able to receive and accept their gifts when they visited me.  It was only when a few of those more determined resources forced their way into my consciousness did I realize how much I was missing and how much others had to offer me.

Despite my belief that I was alone, that this was my battle, and I had to be a strong enough force to work through the pain and the challenges, the truth is I was never alone – there was a constant stream of people who stepped up and offered encouragement, advice, counsel, and love.  Though I wasn’t in a place to receive or accept it, it doesn’t mean help wasn’t offered.  For it was – time and time again.

One of the powerful lessons in the 100Pedals journey is practicing humility.  I recently shared a lesson in humility in a recent blog post.  Humility is recognizing that we cannot and need not fight our battles alone; and, there are people in our lives who are willing and prepared to assist us in our struggles and our life challenges.  Our willingness to ask for and receive involves overcoming our determination that this is our battle and ignoring the misplaced perception of admitting failure if we have to ask for help.  Nothing could be further from the truth.

Our real failing in our journey is our inability to ask for and receive help when it is offered to us.  For it is our inability to recognize and appreciate the visit from committed and experienced resources who are offering help, that extends the struggle.

When I reflect on the number of people — many who I really did not know that well — who offered me counsel and guidance in my most difficult days, I am awed and humbled.  The number of  individuals who visited me on my journey, offered their profound empathy and counsel, and moved on is staggering.  They moved on mostly because I was not in a place to receive or celebrate their visit and the gift of their support.  I was still engaged in my internal struggle and embracing the notion that this was, after all, my personal battle.   Had I been open to receive their guidance, their advice, their counsel, their support, I would have found strength in their presence.  Instead, I sent them on the way, comforted by the fact they offered me something; but, I only received a very small piece of what they were attempting to give me.

The following quote relates to this experience: “People parade through your life for a reason; make the most of the opportunity to learn from every one of them.” Remember, whatever your challenge, your issue or your pain, you are never alone.  People are brought into your life every day to assist you with what is troubling you the most.  Be receptive and aware of their visit so you can maximize the opportunity to find the strength, guidance, support and love they have to offer.  Though it may be your journey, you are never alone in it.

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Addiction in the Family, Humility and Authenticity, Parenting and Addiction , , , ,
About Dave Cooke

Dave Cooke is a dad on a mission. His mission is to help parents get control of their lives over the powerful, destructive influences of a child's addiction. As the father of a son in a ten year heroin battle, Dave knows all to well the challenges parents and families face. He also knows there is a way to find peace in the chaos. It is his mission to help parents discover their path to a healthier, balanced life even if a child's active addiction is still part of their daily journey.